The Sex Trap, Balancing Hormonal Agents and the Head

As I had my early morning coffee, the "Dear Abby" column caught my eye. A reader composed in with a dating problem and ended her letter with that often-heard stereotype that "Women use sex to obtain love, and men utilize love to obtain sex." This is a terrific summation of the "Sex Trap."

The Sex Trap resembles the Love Trap, where songs interpret great sex as love. Those who fall into the Sex Trap go even farther since for these singles, having sex carries enormous meaning and consequences.

Songs fall under the Sex Trap in one (or both) of two methods:

A.they think sex is a needed test of compatibility, (if the sex readies then the relationship will ready as well).

B.more commonly, all consciousness goes out the window, and one or both previously level-headed songs consider themselves a dedicated couple as quickly as they make love.
So, rather than taking a look at whether this other individual might be a match on levels aside from physical attraction-- such as long-lasting requirements, requirements, and desires-- they are blind-sided by the chemistry under the covers.

No doubt, it can be challenging to communicate with truth when all those hormones are cutting loose. Our body reacts to somebody we are drawn in to by producing hormonal agents such as PEA or phenylethylamine (natural amphetamine), dopamine and norepinephrine (natural mood enhancers), and testosterone (increases libido), which makes the chance to have sex with someone we are drawn in to exceptionally difficult to withstand. After orgasm, we produce oxytocin (which acts on the hypothalamus to produce feelings), which makes us feel extremely close to and bonded with our sex Bonuses partner.

These chain reactions are strong and involuntary , causing powerful sensations of attraction, enjoyment, nearness, well-being, and love .

When problems occur, those who fall into the Sex Trap typically rationalize by believing, "Well, we've got issues, however the sex is terrific!" They most likely wouldn't confess, however they focus on physical intimacy and relate to the rest as optional. Their primary scouting tools are sexual attraction and official site physical compatibility.

Barry North, an RCI coach who works mainly with gay guys, states that many of his clients have fallen into the Sex Trap.

" For gay guys particularly in metropolitan locations, sex is easily available, and that in itself is a trap," North says. Why waste your time if the sex isn't really going to be excellent?".

North adds, "I believe this is a ' person' thing rather than a 'gay' thing.".
I do wish to explain that chemistry is necessary. Chemistry is a given that we cannot manage in a relationship; it is either there or not there, and it should be there for the partnership to work. If not there, we can't "make" chemistry take place, though sometimes it can grow over time.

Singles who pursue a relationship based upon sexual chemistry danger relationship failure when the hormone-induced intoxication disappears and truth hits.

To prevent the Sex Trap, you need to balance your heart (and hormones) with your head. This means combining chemistry with good sense. While excellent sex is essential for a sustainable relationship, you need to make your partner choices by paying full focus on your vision, requirements, goals, and values -- while feeling all those interesting stimulates!

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